My Only Regret
by klainecrisscolferforever
Summary: Just a one shot to express my feels on the Haleb situation for 6B! Ooooo I might even expand :) #HalebIsEndgame always in my book xoxoxo
1. Chapter 1

A little one shot because I'm in my feels about Hanna being engaged to someone who is NOT Caleb coming up in January.

I OWN NOTHING :(

Hanna's POV

I can not believe I was gonna marry that douche! How could I be so blind, so stupid to not see what was going on in front of me?! I should have listened, I should've fucking listened to EVERYONE! I let people get into my head and stop me from following my heart.

'You never end up with your high school sweetheart.'

'Caleb's not good enough for you.'

'He can provide so much more for you.'

'You guys are the new it couple, it doesn't get much better than that.' Except it does! It does get better than that because he didn't love me. He wouldn't do any and everything for me. I was his goddamn trophy, not his partner! I didn't have to second guess with Caleb, I knew he was the one for me even when everything tried to keep us apart. He was the one for me and I blew it because of stupid work and society telling me how my life should be. After the girls left, after witnessing me throwing things, shouting, cussing, crying, and drinking, I sat by the fire and tossed every last memory I had of that man and watched it burn. How did my life get so screwed up? I had a plan, it wasn't the most thought out, but I knew what I wanted. I wanted New York, I wanted Caleb, I wanted marriage, and I wanted babies. I can't believe I got so off track with the plan, and now it's just too late. After throwing in the last photo of me and that cheating bastard, I just sit and sip my third glass of wine. Suddenly, I hear someone at the door knocking, not giving a shit about my appearance, I reluctantly got up, stumbling a little, and answered the door. I didn't even bother to see who it was before I opened it, and there stood the man of my dreams looking at me.

"Caleb? What are you doing here?"

"Toby called, after getting an ear full from Spencer. He told me I should come check on you and now I'm glad I did. What's going on Hanna?" he asks stepping around me and entering the house. I close the door and walk over to the couch, flopping down.

"Wine? It's really good," I say gulping down the rest before pouring another.

"Stop it Hanna and talk to me." I sigh out of both frustration and misery.

"I screwed up. I screwed up big time," I finally say with tears rolling down my face.

"What happened? How did you mess up?"

"By giving you up," I finally meet his eyes.

"Hanna, listen you-"

"No, you listen please. I let the world determine how I should feel and what would be good for me. When in reality, you have always been my good thing. I don't know when my head started ignoring my heart, but I am so very sorry. I let my job, new friends, traveling, and eventually another guy make me give up the best man I have ever known. In high school, I had absolutely nothing figured out, but I did know that whatever plans I made, you would be apart of them. I stopped believing in love being enough, when it was along with everything you had to offer. I blew the best thing to ever happen to me, and it came around and bit me in the ass... hard. I am so sorry Caleb," I am full on sobbing right now.

"Hanna, babe, listen, this is not all your fault. I should have fought harder, I should have done some things differently, but I never have and never will stop loving you. You are everything to me and that's enough to wait on you for a lifetime. We both made some mistakes and yeah it sucks, but loving you would never be one of those mistakes because it is the worst, yet best pain I've ever felt," he says hugging me close.

"He cheated, several times. I knew about two, but not so much the others until someone announced that they were pregnant with his child. I don't know what came over me, but all I saw was red, and all I felt was anger and betrayal. Surprisingly enough, I didn't have a problem with letting him go, I had a problem with possibly never getting you back. Leaving you, choosing work over you, will always be my regret concerning us."

"I love you so much Hanna."

"I love you too Caleb." Next thing I know, we are kissing with such fire, such passion, such love, that I've missed over the last few years. No other feeling compares to his lips on mine, his heart beating in sync with mine, or his touch caressing my body. He was my home and boy was I glad to be back.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2 Hanna's POV

It's been 2 months since Caleb and I decided to work everything through and I couldn't be happier. Things are actually going well which I am incredibly thankful for. I still have time before I go back to New York, and I'm gonna try my damnest to convince Caleb to come back. I want a do-over, and hopefully he will too. Today, I'm not feeling too well, so I'm just laying around while people are coming in and out of the house to check on me per my mom and Caleb's insistence. Right now, Emily is here, mostly to get away from Ali, but it's not unwelcomed. I have no idea what's going on there, but I really don't want to think about it because my stomach is doing some serious backflips. Out of nowhere, I am up and running to the nearest bathroom and puking out the soup that Aria made for me an hour or so ago. In comes Emily, rubbing my back and pushing back my hair to place a warm rag on my head. I love my friends, but a little stomach bug isn't gonna kill me.

"I'm fine Em. I guess I shouldn't have eaten just yet," I say wiping my mouth and gargling mouthwash because the taste is just awful.

"I know, but we're all worried about you Han. How long have you been feeling like this exactly?" she questions with a worried expression.

"On and off for a few weeks. Nothing major, just tired and puking up everything that past my lips. I'm fine though, really I am." I don't know who I'm trying to convince anymore because I feel horrible. A look flashes across Emily's face, and I immediately get confused at what could possibly be going through her head.

"What?"

"Listen, I'm gonna go, but I'll be right back. If any of the girls show, tell them to stay put," she says quickly before helping me up and racing towards the door. I stand there incredibly confused at what just took place.

"Okay," I say to the empty house before shrugging it off and going back to the living room. I change the channel to a TV movie, and watch it until sleep takes over my body and I am out like a light.

Emily's POV

How the hell didn't anyone else pick this up? I mean, the signs are beyond obvious, but no one thought to at least to make sure? Hanna just might be pregnant, and by that cheating son of a bitch to boot. I have no idea how the girls will react, how Hanna will react, but most of all how Caleb will react. After I ran out of the house, I sent a mass group text, excluding Hanna and the guys of course, for everyone to show up at Hanna's. I think she will definitely need her friends when we find out the results. Next, I drive to the store and travel up and down every aisle until I find what I need. Never really having this problem due to preference, I grab two of everything just to be sure. Once I pay for everything, I drive back to Hanna's and I see Aria, Alison, and Spencer's cars sitting on the curb. _That was fast, but I did say urgent._ I open the door to a sleepy looking Hanna, and three confused faces looking a little too worried.

"Hey guys. Wanna help me with this?" They all take at least one bag in the kitchen, where I am quickly attacked with questions.

"What's going on Em?"

"Yeah, what's so urgent, I was helping my mom with campaign strategy."

"And I was reviewing a new book, which wasn't going so well, so continues."

"Okay," I interrupt the millions of questions. "Listen, this is urgent, but not life threatening okay. I just discovered something and I think Hanna would very much need her friends after I tell her."

"Tell her what?" asked Spencer.

"Okay, so you know how Hanna's been sick on and off for a few weeks?" They all nod. "Well did you notice any other symptoms from her?"

"Well, she couldn't keep any food down," Aria chimed in.

"And she's been really tired lately. Tired to the point of dosing in the middle of a conversation," adds Alison.

"Oh and uhm, she's been like really emotional. But I thought that had something to do with the king of the douchebags," Spencer says rolling her eyes.

"Now, what do you get when you put all those things together?" I say, anticipating for them to figure it out. It takes a minute before I see Spencer's eyes widen, followed by Aria and Alison.

"So, you think?"

"There's a chance that-?"

"Wow," finished Ali. "So what do you need us to do exactly?"

"Look in the bags," I say and they all peek in seeing so many pregnancy test.

"Uhm, Em, I don't think she needs all of these, did you rob the store of every test you could fine," Spencer chuckles.

"No! I've never had to go through this, so yeah I got as many as I could. I wanted to be sure, plus who knows how these things work?" All three girls raises their hands to indicate that they did. I just roll my eyes at that and move on.

"Anyway, I'm gonna talk to Hanna and see what she thinks and hopefully-"

"See what I think about what?" Hanna herself interrupts.

"Oh, uhm, sweetie, we want to talk to you about something," Aria starts, leading Hanna to a seat at The kitchen table.

"Okay, that doesn't worry me at all, what's going on guys?"

"Hanna Banana," Spencer says using the nickname she gave her to soften the blow as much as possible. "How long have you been feeling sick?"

"Oh, well I told Em, it's only been a few weeks, off and on. I'm fine though, just a little tired and nauseous," she tells us, still missing the point.

"Hanna, hunny, I don't think you're adding this up, so here you go," Alison says reaching into one of the bags taking out a test. She passes the item to Hanna, who accepts it with a confused expression.

"A p-pregnancy test?" she stammers out. "Why would I need-. Oh shit!" she says right before fainting.

Hanna's POV

I wake up to a warm rag dabbing at my face, completely dazed. _What the hell just happened?_

"Hey sunshine," Spencer smiles down at me, rag still pressed to my forehead.

"We so didn't expect you to faint on us," Ali laughed.

"What the hell happened?" I say relaxing back into the couch.

"Ali caused you to faint," Emily says which earns a glare from Alison.

"I did not. Somebody had to speed things up. Besides, I know we all want to know if we'll be aunts or not," she smiles over at me. _Aunties?_ Holy shit, I could be pregnant! How the hell am I supposed to explain this to Caleb? We just got back together and now, ugghhh. I groan out loud at my inner thoughts about how stupid I was to not use a condom, but things happened so fast and I felt safe and loved that I was only thinking about us being us again. I rise up, slowly because I'm still a little dizzy.

"Where's the test? I have to be sure," I say looking at my four best friends.

"Kitchen, but be mindful that Emily brought them and because of her 'preference' it may looked like she brought in bulk for the next few years," informs Aria which just cause the others to laugh, except Emily who glared. I walk into the kitchen and see two bags on the counter and one on the kitchen table, which looks like a shit load of water. I look inside the two bags on the counter, and my eyes just about popped out of my head.

"Really Em, the most I needed was like two, and FYI, _First Response_ is the best," I say taking four test just to be sure. I take two bottles of water from the last bag and march to the restroom to find out the truth. I can hear the girls talking outside the cracked door, but all I'm focused on is finding out if my dream came true. I seriously want a baby and even if I have to raise it alone, it will be mine to raise. _This is it, this is my future_. I think as I rip open the first box and chug down as much water as I can.

HCHCHCHCHCHCHCHCHCHC

Four tests, one and a half bottles of water, and several minutes of waiting in anticipation and the timer finally goes off. Being too nervous to look myself, each girl grabs a test, with gloves on of course, and check for me. I am a nervous wreck as they look at the results together, share knowing looks at each, and finally turn back around to look at me.

"What? What is it? Tell me what!" I exclaim, both wanting and not wanting to know. One by one, each of my best friends turn the sticks around to face me. From Aria, to Emily, to Spencer, to Alison, each test revealed the same, sealing my fate. Tears streamed down, as each girl came rushing over for a big group hug, I hug back fiercely as the news began to sink in. When we break apart, we each have wet eyes and big smiles.

"Positive? They're all positive! I'm gonna have a baby? Holy shit, I'm gonna have a baby!" I exclaimed clearly excited. We all laugh and just bask in the change that's about to come.

"So are you gonna tell him? I mean I know you guys won't be back together because he's a cheater and all, but he has a right to know," says Alison, once everything calmed down.

"Why would I tell him? He has no rights to my child," I say very confused.

"Yes, he does Hanna. I know you want nothing to do with him, but he's gonna be apart of your life with the baby being on the way and all," chimed Spencer. I look at the others as they nod in agreement. Wait, they think? Oh hell no.

"No. No, you guys thought? Oh, hell no, he's NOT the father," I inform.

"WHAT?!" They say in unison.

"He's NOT the father! We haven't slept together in months, so there is NO way it's his."

"So who is the father Hanna? Please don't tell me, you were cheating too," Emily says.

"Of course not, I would never do that, the father is Caleb," I mumbled his name, not knowing how they would react.

"Who?" asks Alison. I sigh deeply and repeat myself a little louder.

"Caleb. Caleb's the father," I breathe waiting for the shit storm to wreak havoc, but it was just silent.

"How?"

"When?"

"Really?"

"Well, after you guys left, after I went all crazy about his cheating, Caleb came by thanks to Spencer," I say looking pointedly at her. "She called Toby who called Caleb and he showed up as I was burning every memory of that scumbag. We talked, I cried, we talked some more, I cried some more. Then we said I love you and next thing I know, well you get the idea," I say intend of going any further in detail. "We, uhm, have been working things out since then, and I'm really happy because I love him more than anything and now we're having a baby," I say still amazed at the last part.

"We're really happy for you guys Hanna," says Emily pulling me into a hug.

"Yeah, and no matter what, you are not alone in this whatsoever," Aria is the next to join the hug.

"Right! We are with you one hundred percent, no questions asked," followed Spencer. We all look at Alison in anticipation. A lot has changed over the years, we are all closer, but for the right reasons. And now I couldn't imagine going through such a life changing experience without everyone I love the most.

"I'm with you, but you have to tell Caleb. Whatever happens from there, we will deal with it," she smiles and joins in on the love feast. I was the first of us all to have a baby, and I couldn't be happier. Now I just have to tell the father, that he's going to be a father.


	3. Chapter 3

Hey guys! I bring love, gratitude, and an update! Thank you so much for all the love, I am eternally grateful for the support, and I finally have an update for you all! You guys keep me going, so sit back and enjoy, leave reviews if you see fit and let me know what you think. I will try to update once more as soon as possible, love you guys xoxoxo

Chapter 3 Hanna's POV

It's been about two weeks since we all discovered that I was gonna be a mom. I made a doctor's appointment right away and it was officially confirmed three days later. I am currently 10 weeks along and everything was just fine and the baby and I were both healthy. All that's left to do besides get physically ready for the baby, is to tell the father. I am beyond worried about how he will react because we just got back together, and maybe he'll think a baby right now would just mess everything up. But I think a baby, that I've wanted for so long with the man I love more than anything is exactly what we need, well what I need at least. I'm supposed to meet Caleb later at some new restaurant in town where I plan on telling him about the baby. Right now, I am visiting my mom for a quick coffee before stopping by Spencer's house to see the girls.

"So how are you sweetheart?" my mom asks after taking a sip of her beverage.

"A lot has happened, but I'm actually fine," I smile at her. She knows about everything from the break up to the sickness, but I have yet to tell her about Caleb and the baby.

"I know Hanna, but it's good you found out now before the big day. Maybe now, things will settle and you'll be able to move on and be happy, single or not." She squeezes my hand and smiles at me. Okay now is the time to tell her.

"Hey mom?"

"Yeah, baby?" she answers taking yet another sip while I have yet to touch mine.

"You know how I've been sick for the last few months?" She nods looking a little concerned.

"Okay, so I went to the doctor a few weeks ago and it was confirmed that I, uhm, I am-"

"Hanna, are you okay? Please tell me that you are okay," she exclaims looking about ready to freak out completely.

"Mom, I'm fine. I'm actually better than fine. Mom, I'm pregnant," I smile at her. She's just sitting there, completely stunned, not saying a word, not moving a muscle. "Mom? Mom are you okay?"

"A b-baby? You're having a baby? How? I mean I know how, but are you sure?"

"Yeah, mom, I'm pretty sure. The doctor confirmed it two weeks ago after I took the home tests," I explained.

"Wow, that's a lot to take in. So you're not exactly free of him I see. So what are we gonna do? Are you gonna go back to him? Because I gotta say Hanna, I don't think that's a good idea. You can both co-parent without being together. Once a cheater, always a cheater and I don't want to see you go through what I did," she rambles and I am beyond confused until it dawns on me.

"Oh, mom. Mom? Mom, stop talking!" She finally stops talking so that I can speak. "I should have explained, but you didn't really give me a chance," I chuckle.

"Explain what?"

"The baby isn't his. He's not the father, so you can breathe mom," I assure. Life was brought back to her skin when I told her that, and she took a deep breath.

"Good. That's good, so who's the father and does he know?" I just love how my mom doesn't judge me.

"I am telling him today actually and it isn't some random guy if you're wondering."

"I wasn't and good to know. Do I get to know who?"

"The father is Caleb," I mumble.

"Who?"

"Caleb mom. It's Caleb," I say clearly this time. I am met with a confused expression from one Ashley Marin, mixed with what looks like relief.

"So, you're back.. you're back together? When? How did this happen?"

"Well, after my episode with finding out with a liar and an asshole that he was, I kind of freaked out on the girls. Spencer told Toby, who informed Caleb, who in turn came over to see if I was okay. We got to talking, feelings were acknowledged, we kissed, and yeah," I finished lamely.

"How long ago was this?" she questions.

"Close to three months. We're really happy mom," I sigh a little lovestruck if I do say so myself.

"Well, I'm happy for you baby girl. All I want is for you to be happy and I am so relieved and happy that you found that happiness with Caleb," she confesses embracing me in a lingering hug. We talk a little more about work, the new man in her life, and baby preparation before she has to head off to work and I have to meet Caleb soon. I hug and kiss her goodbye and she wishes me luck, something I'm gonna need along with strength and hope that Caleb reacts well to the news.

HCHCHCHCHCHCHCHCHCHC

Caleb's POV

I am meeting Hanna in a bit, but first I wanted to stop by and talk to Toby just to see if he knows what secret Hanna is keeping from me. She said she had to talk to me about something, and if Spencer knows, Toby knows usually.

"Hey man," my best buddy greets as he opens the door to his home.

"Hey."

"So what's with the impromptu visit? Everything cool?" he says sitting on the sofa, offering for me to do the same. As I plop down next to his, I breathe deeply before just cutting to the chase.

"Do you know about some great big secret Hanna is keeping from me? I mean things have been going great and now she wants to meet me in like a hour to tell me something important. Has Spencer mentioned anything to you?" I question, dying to know what the hell is going on.

"Not that I know of. All Spence has told me is the fact that she now knows about you and Hanna and that she was happy everything worked out. I guess she and the girls have been taking care of Han because she's been sick and they didn't want her to be left alone at anytime," he explained.

"Yeah, it's been an on and off bug for about two weeks, I believe. Her mom, the girls, and I have all been rotating being there incase she needed something," I offer.

"Yeah, well, that's all I know right now. Maybe it's about her job or something. Have you thought about going back to New York?"

"Yup, and I still don't know. It was so hard last time with the everything that happened and I don't want us to go back to that place with bad memories and unresolved issues. If I decide to go back, I want everything laid out on the table and time to heal. Toby, I can't go back without being sure we can make it this time, through absolutely anything," I say sounding like a sap, but finally expressing how I've been feeling about Hanna and I being back together.

"I get it. How many people know? About what caused you guys to drift?"

"You, Ashley, and Emily as far as I know. I doubt she's told the others just yet, but Em was there when it all went down," I tell him, flashbacks trying there damnest to breakthrough, but I just suppress them further away. He nods in understanding. We chat for a few more minutes before I realize I need to be making my way to Hanna's to pick her up for dinner.

HCHCHCHCHCHCHCHCHCHC

When we finally arrive at the restaurant, we are seated fairly quickly, thanks to the reservations I made earlier in the day. The restaurant is quaint with a nice atmosphere without being too stuffy with little to no personality. Throughout the evening, I am constantly glance at Hanna to make sure she's alright seeing as how she's still been a little sick, but not as much. We have idly small talk, and everything is peaceful and comfortable for us. The talking, the flirting, the memories, and the love are all present making this one hell of an evening. Thankfully Hanna was getting along great and has yet to display a reason for us to leave early to tend to her sickness. When desert comes around, we decide to split a piece of apple pie a la mode. As we are digging into our sweet, Hanna grows a little too quite for my liking.

"Everything okay babe?" She startles just a little and looks me in the eyes.

"Yeah, yeah everything is perfect," she smiles at me which I can tell is a bit forced.

"Talk to me Han. What's on your mind? I can tell when you've got something to say, but don't know exactly how. So just tell me, straight up, no bullshit," I say intertwining our hands over the table. I see her take a deep breath before opening her mouth to speak.

"Okay, so you know how I've been sick a lot lately right?" I nod in affirmation. "Well, Emily kind of came to a conclusion of a diagnosis, which she shared with the girls, then shared with me. Long story short, I uhm, well you see Caleb... I'm pregnant," she finally blurts out. My eyes completely bug out of my head, beyond shocked at her confusion. _What the hell?_

"What the hell?" I repeat out loud.

"Yeah, I'm pregnant right this very moment," she chuckles awkwardly.

"Is it his or...? I let the statement hang in the air.

"Oh no, hell no. He and I haven't been together in months with our busy schedules and you know the cheating on me and all," she trails off and I am just sitting in complete shock. I honestly don't know how to take this all in, especially after what happened to us in New York.

"A-are you gonna keep it?" I stammer out. She nods her head in affirmation. "Are you sure? I mean, are you sure you're ready for this? That we're ready for this? I mean, I love you Hanna, I do, but a baby could complicate so much right now," I question, really wanting to see where her head was at with everything.

"I know what happened. I lived it and it was the worst thing we've ever been through, worst then freaking -A trying to ruin our lives. But I know that this is meant to be, for me, if not you as well. I love you too Caleb, but I've made my decision, with or without your support," she replies calmly, but I could detect the underlining tone of anger, disappointment, and sadness.

"Babe, I'm not saying you don't have my support. I just wanna be sure that this is what we want, and this is something we can handle this time around no matter what happens. I never want to see you go through the pain that we did before ever again. We couldn't handle everything before, I just wanna make sure that we can now, no matter the outcome," I saw tightening my grip on her hand just a little with the pad of my thumb rubbing back and forth to try a soothe a now crying Hanna. Seeing how we are still in a pretty public place, I quickly pay the tab, guide her out of the building and to the car and head to her place. The ride is silent and a air of sadness is surrounding us in this moment, no doubt remembering the saddest moment that torn us apart so many years ago.


	4. Chapter 4

Hey! Third update in two days and hopefully more to come soon for this and my other fics! School is kicking my butt, but I love you guys for hanging in there with me! Never expected so much love and interest for this story, but gosh you guys are just awesome! Hope you guys enjoy a little #Haleb flashback to go along with #PRETTYLITTLELIAR DAY! Tune in tonight guys because I'm sure it's gonna be amazing! Anticipating some OTP interaction... Hope you enjoy this chapter and be on the look out for me xoxoxo

DISCLAIMER: I OWN NOTHING, MARLENE DOES, BUT SHE NEEDS TO GET HER STUFF TOGETHER LIKE YESTERDAY :)

Chapter 4 No One's POV

 _Flashback_

 _Something is seriously wrong._

" _Caleb? Caleb, baby wake up please," she shakes him awake._

" _What? What's going on Hanna?" he replies groggily still half asleep._

" _Something is wrong? Something just doesn't feel right," she winces as she moves feeling her cotton gown sticking to her. She looks down under the covers and what she thinks is something as embarrassing as pee turns out to be her worst nightmare. "C-caleb?" He looks at her motioning for him to look under the covers. Confused he looks down and his eyes damn near pop out of his head. Blood was everywhere and soaking through the sheets at a rapid pace. He scrambles off the bed and runs around looking for a change of clothes for Hanna and himself, shoes, and wallet._

" _Okay babe, I need a little help. Rise up for me... slowly, so that I can change your clothes. Once Hanna is in a sitting position, he races into the bathroom at lightening speed to retrieve a wet wash cloth to clean her off a bit before helping her into a dress and her slippers. In his mind, the fashionista can wait because his fiancee needs help. After getting dressed himself, he helps her stand and carefully leads her, with belongings in hand to the car just outside the door. He could never be more grateful that they lived on the second floor. Twenty or so minutes with a panicking Hanna and a scared Caleb, they finally arrive at the hospital. They spot a wheelchair upon arrival and he carefully places Hanna into it before wheeling her to the front desk._

" _We need help please. Something is wrong with my fiancee!" he says to the lady at the front desk. She and about two nurses come around to assist them, with them wheeling Hanna away and Caleb being left behind going out of his mind with worry. An hour or so later, someone with real information finally comes out to talk to him._

" _She lost a lot of blood, but we were able to stop the bleeding. Hanna is going to be just fine. However, I'm afraid your son didn't pull through," the doctor informs which sends him in a state of utter distraught._

" _Can I see them? Please can I see my family?" he asks tears streaming down his face. The doctor nods sympathetically and leads him to the room that hold his soon-to-be wife and his son. Wiping away his stray tears and taking a deep breath, Caleb enters the room to a heartbreaking sight. There sitting in a hospital bed lays his one true love, holding their son in her arms, crying her heart out. She looks up towards the door at the sound of it opening. Upon setting her eyes on Caleb, she loses it once again. Caleb rushes over to her bedside ready to comfort her and hopefully receive comfort in return. He climbs into the hospital bed with her and just holds her while they look down on the tiny bundle in Hanna's arms._

" _J-j-jaden Caleb," she whispers with a chocked out sob. The young couple look at each other before looking back down at their baby boy._

" _Perfect," he whispers before leaning over to kiss her forehead in an act of silent love. They sit there and mourn the loss of hopes, dreams, and their baby boy._

HCHCHCHCHCHCHCHCHCHC

No One's POV

End Of Flashback

Things after that just went downhill from there. Hanna was discharged the next day and they had a little memorial a week later. They only one's to know about what happened were Emily and Toby. It's not like they didn't want to tell the others, it was just the fact that they were so busy with their own lives and they didn't see them as often. After the memorial, Hanna and Caleb both threw themselves into their work, barely seeing each other except most nights for bed. They avoided talking about him, wedding plans were put on hold, and eventually they fell apart. They hid everything, never talking about how they were feeling until it all bubbled over.

 _Flashback_

" _You never wanna go out anymore! You're always working! What has happened to us?" she shouts at him after once again being blown off. Caleb was supposed to be her date for a business luncheon that he agreed to months ago. All of a sudden he cancels, leaving her to go alone._

" _Well, I'm sorry that I have to make money to pay bills in this place! We need heat, lights, and gas Hanna, or have you forgotten?" he says irritated._

" _Not with you constantly reminding me Caleb! I don't get this new you! We used to always go out, have fun, enjoy life! Now you just sit around working and forgetting about me and my needs! What the hell?" she's yelling now, full on yelling._

" _Well, excuse me for wanting to grow up and take my responsibilities as a man and soon-to-be husband seriously! I am always home at a descent hour, unlike you, who creeps in at 2 and 3 in the morning! I am trying here Hanna and you're not making this easy! Hanna what is this conversation really about?"_

" _I don't know okay? I don't know! I feel like you're neglecting me and my feelings! I don't want to just waste my life! I'm young, I have a career, I have you! It's not like I'm being held back with kids-" Things go silent and they just stare wide-eyed at each other. Caleb sits on the chair, while Hanna eventually sits on the sofa preparing for a long overdue conversation._

" _So that's what this is all about? Staying out late, never home, picking arguments just for the hell of it? Are you somehow relieved that Jaden didn't make it?" he asks in a soft choked up voice. Next, thing you know, she is looking at him like he personally is to blame for everything._

" _How dare you say that to me! You have some nerve asking that stupid ass question! Who the hell do you think you are? Jaden was my son, MY son and he meant the world to me! I was ready to start a family, to get married, and live happily ever after! I was ready for us to grow old together! But it wasn't in the cards for me, for us! That was my baby and when he died, my heart did as well! So yes, I stayed away from home, working later. I did everything in my power to avoid his room, where he was supposed to be just a few months from now. I tried everything I could to forget, but when I am here or I see a couple with a stroller I always remember. One minute I'm fine and the next, I find myself thinking about what he would've looked like, what he would have sounded like. Sometimes I would even rub my belly before realizing that he's not there! He's not there and it's like reliving that pain over and over again. I should be a mother, I should be a wife, I should be happy. Yet, the man I love is never around, and I'm lonely! I go to these stupid functions to be surrounded by people, fake or not, someone is talking to me like they give a damn even just a little. You may come home to me at night, but your mind is somewhere else entirely. You don't get to question me doing whatever the hell I need to do to not think about the fact that my baby is gone! I relive that pain every single day of my life, but for a few moments when I am running around as Celeste assistant or entertaining some fake ass models and business people, I don't think or live, I'm just there. I-i'm just t-t-there," she breaks down letting every emotion she's ever bottled up spill over. He races to her side, hugging her close as they both cry in each others arms._

" _What do you want Hanna?" he croaks out the question._

" _Not this. I need to get off this roller coaster. I can't do this anymore Caleb," she whimpers._

" _You want me to leave?"_

 _"I don't want you too, but I need you to. I need to put myself back together without you. You are my one true love and everything I've ever wanted since I was 16 years old, but I can't keep living like this. And you shouldn't have to either. I love you so much. Enough to let you go, to be free of all of this, of me," she confesses._

" _I never wanted freedom Hanna, I just wanted you. You weren't the only one torn apart because of Jaden's death. I worked and worked myself to death to avoid feeling too much or anything at all. I never wanted to hurt you or neglect you. I just needed a way to deal with what happened and figure out how to make you happy again. I am so so sorry that I can't be that for you anymore, not right now at least. But I will always love you, no limitations and no questions asked," he says looking her right in the eye, hoping for her to see his sincerity and truth._

" _I love you Caleb Rivers," she smiles sadly at him._

" _Do me a favor or two? If it can't be me, find someone who will make you happy. You deserve all the happiness in the world. And two, heed my warning, don't become a Sybil because you are perfect just the way you are," he says. She nods in agreement, fresh tears cascading down her face._

" _Okay." They share a kiss, packing all of their love, hate, sadness, grief, anger, and passion that had into it._

" _I love you too Hanna Marin."_


	5. Chapter 5

Hey guys! Did you miss me?! Nah, but I'm so sorry for not updating anything in a long time! School and my sucky job has been getting in the way. I've been working on this chapter and a few others for awhile now, as well as new stories that I will start just as soon as I finish at least two more stories that are already in progress! That means a lot of more Haleb, Spoby, Ezria, Emison, and whatever other ship goodness. Send prompts if you want your couple in a one-shot or story of their own. Also to those who have been wanting stories and have sent me prompts already, I am unbelievably sorry for the delay. It's all a work in progress I swear and no story will ever be left unfinished. Be patient with me because as much as I love writing, especially for you guys, school is my priority right now until graduation in just 2-3 more semesters. So here it is, the next chapter and I know it's short, but more to come! I hope you guys enjoy xoxoxo

Chapter 5 Hanna's POV

The ride home was silent, mostly because I didn't want to talk. I knew this conversation would come back at some point and no matter how much I hate it, it needs to be addressed. We finally pulled up to the house and park the car. We just sit there in more deafening silence until he eventually gets out, before coming around to assist me out. Something I find annoying, but really endearing. I'm not that pregnant just yet, but I know that's how he was when I was first pregnant, so I got used to it. I unlock the door and we immediately walked to the kitchen, him to get water and me to sit down from my emotionally exhausting day. He sits the glasses down and takes his seat across from me, and nobody talks, not really knowing where to start.

"Hanna."

"Caleb," we say at the same time which caused a chuckle or two which thankfully broke the tension. I motion for him to go first, really wanting to know what was going through his mind.

"No matter if we were together or apart, since I've met you I've known I wanted you to be apart of my life. I knew that I wanted to love you, take care of you, and grow old with you. Deep down, I knew you would change my life and you did Han, you did. All those years ago I couldn't wait to make you my wife and the mother of my child. I wanted so bad to make that dream a reality and I almost got it right. When we lost Jaden, I really didn't know what to do with myself. I didn't know how to handle it and the fact that I didn't know what to do, we suffered. I guess where I'm going with this is I am 1000% behind you, but promise me whatever happens that we won't break again. I can't lose you again Hanna and I want you to promise me that I won't. This is going to be tough on us, with us making sure that we get the chance to see this little one grow, but I'm willing to do this with you, beside you no matter what we may face," he says to me. I just sit there in both shock and awe of this man that I've loved for so long. I've had the same pictures of happily ever after in my head as well, and I never really imagined anyone but Caleb being the one I share that with.

"I want that to so much. Every dream, thought, and picture in my head... it was always you. I love you so much and I really want to be with you for the rest of my life. I want the marriage, the kids, the growing old together. I want it all with nobody, but you. I promise not to let you go again no matter what happens along the way. I know it's going be tough with the worry of losing this baby too, but I want this more than anything," I sob to him, really crying hard at this moment.

"Then, let's do it. Let's have this baby, let's be together, let's do this!" he says smiling at me.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," he nods. "I love you so much Hanna."

"I love you too Caleb," I say kissing him like it's the first and last time I ever will, which couldn't be further from the truth. He is my past, my present, my future, and my forever.

HCHCHCHCHCHCHCHCHCHC

It's been a few weeks since then, and now here we sit at our first doctor's appointment together. Today we get to hear the heart beat and reaffirm that our new bundle of joy is happy and healthy, growing and living inside of me. It's something most people wouldn't freak out about, but I am nervous as hell. I'm afraid that something will go wrong, that the doctor will tell me some very bad news just like so long ago.

"Babe, calm down. We won't know anything until we actually see the doctor, but I'm sure everything is fine."

"How can you possibly know that? Last time everything was fine until it wasn't. I don't want to lose this baby. I can't lose this baby," she finishes with slow tears caressing her face, hands holding her now protruding belly.

"We just have to stay positive that everything will be alright. Have faith that even if something is wrong, that we're in good hands with the doctor and we can get through this. As of now, just deep breaths and relax as much as you can before they call our names, okay Hanna?" Taking a deep breath, I try to calm myself the best I can. Thankfully not too long after, our names are being called to be seen next. I am still jittery for the most part, but at least I'm breathing normally.

"Mr. Rivers, Ms. Marin, how are you today?"

"We're fine, just a little nervous," Caleb answers, intertwining our hands in an act of comfort.

"That's perfectly normal for you to be a little anxious. So, I will not keep you in suspense any longer. I just have a few questions," the doctor begins. After asking questions of our medical and family history, I am laying on stiff paper in a gown that flashes my ass which in turn rubs against the rough ass paper. Taking more deep breaths, legs in stir-ups, feeling exposed as hell, the doctor does her probing.

"Okay Ms. Marin, this will be a bit cold and you'll feel a lot of pressure, but it will all be over soon."

I nod my head in understand while also crushing Caleb's hand and trying not to cry. She wasn't lying about the pressure, I wince in discomfort, which I forget all about at the sound of a strong pounding sound echoing across the room.

"Is that..."

"It sure is. The baby's heartbeat, and it's a strong one," the doctor smiles at us. I can't help but smile back with tears streaming across my face. I look over a Caleb who seems to be wearing the exact same expression as me. It's all becoming real. We're being given a second chance at being parents.

"Now let's see if we can get a picture of the little bean." It takes a few minutes, but soon we're staring at an image of our little peanut and the tears that never stopped, continued to flow. I am just overwhelmed with so many emotions ranging from joy to fear. But in this moment, the most powerful emotion of all is love. Love for this little peanut and who it will become after so many months. Soon I'm getting redressed and rescheduling my next appointment.

"I will see you guys in one month. Here's your pictures and video. Good luck, Ms. Marin, Mr. Rivers, I'll see you soon," the doctor smiles and walks away. The car ride is filled with silence, but a more in awe, joyful silence. We're both still reeling from listening and seeing our baby for the first time. It's all happening and we couldn't be happier, but a small air of worry surrounds us as well. Pulling into _The Radley_ , we exit the car, hand in hand, to meet our friends inside.

"Hanna!" The girls exclaimed while Toby and Ezra just smiles my way. I hug my best friends hello, and sit across from Emily.

"So how was the appointment?" Alison brings up first.

"It was good. We listened to the heartbeat and uhm, here," I say handing each girl an ultrasound picture. I had copies made for them, myself and Caleb, and my mom.

"Oh wow! Our Hanna Banana is really having a baby! The first one of us to reproduce," Spencer teases fondly.

"Terrifying," I say in what I thought was a mumble.

"Why?" Aria asks curiously. I swallow hard and look at my best friends' faces. Only Emily knows because she was visiting at the time it all happened.

"Well, uhm, I was..." I feel Caleb's hand slip into mine, giving an encouraging smile. I don't know why I never told the girls. I guess I just didn't want the sympathetic looks and the treating me with kiddie gloves, but to be honest, I could have used them all when it all happened. Having Emily there was a huge help, but having them all there would've been amazing.

"I was p-pregnant before," I mumbled, but I can tell they heard by the gasps I heard. I then went into full detail of how we lost Jaden and how it caused Caleb and I to drift apart.

"We had no idea," Alison says.

"Emily did because she was there, and I wanted to tell you guys, but it was way too painful, I didn't want to be pitied or be a bother to you guys," I shrug half-heartedly.

"Oh, sweetie, you are never a bother. We're glad you weren't alone, but had we had known we would've been there in a heartbeat," Aria reassures, smiling over at me. I could tell she meant it, that they all meant it by the honest looks in their eyes and smiles on their faces.

"Thanks guys. That means a lot," I smile at them. All sadness was forgotten as we gushed over baby names, baby showers, and how the baby will be spoiled rotten. When we part ways, Caleb and I go home together.

"I know it took a lot to tell them, but I'm so proud of you," he says kissing my head. I cuddle closer to him on the bed and breathe him in.

"I always wonder if things would've been different if I had told them when it happened. Having them all there, they would've helped me through it and make me see reason. Make me see that shutting you out would ultimately destroy me and you," I confess in the dark.

"Well, maybe, but let's not dwell on the past. We're here now and that's all that matters. We have each other and our focus is making sure this little bean is healthy and happy," he smiles at me.

"You're right. I love you Caleb," he kisses me softly but I felt the love behind it.

"I love you too Han."


End file.
